free me

I've had this song on repeat for the last few weeks. Joss Stone rocks!

…Cuz there’s something deep inside of
Me I’ve got to be
And if you find it hard to follow me
If I lose you in my jet stream
Then you only got to raise your eyes
And see me fly
Don’t tell me that I wont I can
Don’t tell me that I’m not I am
Don’t tell me that my master plan
Aint coming through
Don’t tell me that I wont I will
Don’t tell me how to think I feel
Don’t tell me cuz I know what’s real
What I can do
Something that you don’t see everyday
A little girl ‘who’s finding’ her way
Through a world that’s designed to break
All of your dreams
And if there’s one thing I would say to you
It’s that there’s nothing that you can’t do
Cuz it’s all about your attitude don’t let
Them get to you
And we are singing in our own voice
We can make that choice to be
To be free…


I'm having a little trouble with the player, so here's a link to the song:
Free Me by Joss Stone on ilike

If you are not familiar with Joss Stone, check out her music...she is amazing!
http://www.jossstone.com/

c'mon kermit...

It's not easy "being green"?
Really? Because I don't actually think it's that hard. I'm not one to shove recycling, composting, water conservation or other "tree hugging" tendencies down others throats. However, I was recently frusterated when I witnessed someone tossing a plastic bottle into a trash can sitting right next to a recycling bin. And yes, I took the bottle out of the garbage can and threw it into the appropriate bin sitting inches away (and then whipped out the hand sanitizer). So, I saved one bottle. That can't make that big of a difference, can it? I think so.
Let me share a random collection of challenging statistics to get the mind reeling before I rant about the difference one bottle and one person can make:
Recycling ONE aluminum can saves enough energy to run a TV for three hours.
One ton (2000 pounds) of recycled paper can save 17 trees, 380 gallons of oil, three cubic yards of landfill space, 4000 kilowatts of energy, and 7000 gallons of water.
Known as the Great Pacific Garbage Patch and consisting of large concentrations of recyclable plastics, this mass of garbage is found in the north Pacific ocean and occupies an area more than twice the size of Texas.
If each person were to reuse a paper shopping bag for just one trip to the store, we would save 60 000 trees.
In America, the average daily water use per person is 150 gallons. In Japan, the average person uses approximately 100 gallons per day and in France a person uses 75 gallons. In the UK they use approximately 40 gallons per day and in Nigeria they only use 10 gallons per person per day.
A modern glass bottle takes 4000 years or more to decompose, but glass is 100% recyclable and can go from the recycling bin to a store shelf in as little as 30 days!
Need a visual? This is the number of beverage cans and bottles that have been landfilled, littered and incinerated in the U.S. so far this year:

The list of impactful statistics is miles long.
Thinking that one bottle, one newspaper, one leaky faucet or one individual does not have an impact is naive. If every one person thinking that way opened their eyes and changed their minds, the entire world would change DRAMATICALLY. Also, being green is not just a fad leftover from the 90's or a political commentary. It benefits our communities by providing jobs and supporting local businesses. It simply (I can provide some wine with this cheese if you would like) makes our local and global world a better place.
So, what do I do to back up my words?
1. I recycle commonly used materials such as plastic, glass, and paper
2. I use reusable shopping bags (and recycle the plastic bags when I forget)
3. I buy recycled materials (sketchbooks, clothing, water bottles)
4. I try to bike, walk and use public transportation
5. I turn off the faucet while I brush my teeth and wash only full loads of laundry.
6. I wrote this blog to remotivate myself and hopefully at least one other person.
I also would like to share a resource. This is probably the most useful recycling website I have ever found, full of great current information and a search tool for local recycing. Please check it out:
http://earth911.com/
Though I do take many steps to reduce my footprint, reuse what I can and recycle many things, I know I can still do more. I use more water than I need to, I want to garden and compost and I am constantly feeling a pull to pursue recyclable art. I will work toward these things because I do believe that I can make a difference.
So can you.
So, please don't feel guilty or annoyed or judged by what I have just shared. Everyone lives in different circumstances with different resources and opportunities, but there is always at least one thing we can do to leave a smaller footprint. Be inspired. If nothing else, please just throw your plastic bottle into the recycling bin, especially when it is sitting right next to the trash.
And go easy on Kermie. He's had a tough time being green.

30/30 vision

A little over ten years ago, I created a list of thirty things I wanted to do by the time I turned thirty. A few weeks ago, I turned thirty, so it was time to break out the list and see how I did. Now I am choosing to share it and encourage anyone reading to make a list of their own...
The things italicized in red are the six things I simply have not done yet.
The things highlighted in blue I consider that I have kind of done, but not to the extent that I would like to...

1. Travel abroad
2. Learn how to knit
3. Visit all 50 U.S. states
4. See a major sporting event
5. Climb a "14er"
6. Write a song
7. Go snorkeling
8. Be a coach
9. Live on the ocean
10. Live in the mountains
11. Live in a big city
12. Watch the northern lights
14. Go on a month long road trip
15. Learn a second language proficiently
17. Go skinny-dipping
18. Stop biting my nails
19. Volunteer/Service trip
20. Go piranha fishing
21. Sing karaoke
22. Spend new years eve in times square
23. Learn how to snowboard
24. Go on one of the top train rides in the world
25. Take a hot-air balloon ride
26. Learn how to develop film
27. Go on a backpacking trip
28. Sponsor a child
29. Go bungee jumping or parasailing.
30. Make a longer list of things to do once I turn thirty

The first thing on your list could be to make a list...

the third climb's a charm

When the alarm went off at 3:30, I couldn’t remember why I wanted to do this. But when we reached the trailhead, I stepped out into a crisp clear “morning”, was met with a rush of adrenaline and had no doubt I wanted to stand on top of the mountain. Our steps began to follow a trail that would eventually lead to the summit of Mount Elbert. At 14,433 feet, it stands as the highest mountain in Colorado and the second highest in the lower 48.
It was my third attempt at hiking a 14er. The first was Longs Peak, but I turned around only a mile or so up to help someone else down. The second was La Plata Peak, but a heart-wrenching decision to turn around because of a storm had to be made as we neared the summit. I had a strong desire to go back and conquer La Plata, but the thought of staring across (and slightly down) at it from Elbert was satisfying enough.
Before I knew it, our steps met a sunrise and we rose above treeline. Those feats were diminished by some annoying looking clouds and someone on their way DOWN who was nice enough to tell us we had “a LONG way to go”. At least he was honest, but that’s not really what you want to hear as you gaze up at fast moving clouds. I kept staring at the clouds and hiked through the pit in my stomach that feared this would be La Plata all over again. Then it started to spit snow. I was SO happy. Seriously. If it was snowing, that meant it wasn’t raining and if it wasn’t raining, the chance of slippery rocks and lightning was greatly decreased. There is always the chance for lightning and snow, but it’s not too common, as affirmed by mister “long way down” raincloud himself, who was apparently a self-proclaimed thundersnow expert.
The ascent from the first snow on was long. People were hiking through pain. The adrenaline wore off. False summits taunted us. There were some points where I really had to focus on my breathing thanks to the frustrating condition I like to pretend I don’t have called asthma. Snow and sun came and went. Hours passed. Through all of it, we just took step after step.
Finally, the actual summit came into view. A huge rush of adrenaline came over me and I took off hiking faster than I had all day towards it. I’ll never forget stepping onto the top. It was an amazing victorious feeling. From the top of Elbert, it feels like you can see the whole state. It was absolutely incredible.
The weather slowly deteriorated on our long trek down, but I hardly even noticed. The goal had been accomplished and on my first full day of being thirty, I felt a flood of possibility. I am so thankful to Amy, Dave and Cindy for being there with me every step of the way to share a mountaintop experience that will be forever engrained in my heart.
Now who’s ready to enter the Whitney lottery with me?

feeling jazzy

I love music. And there's just something about jazz music that I really love.
I think my swing (no pun intended...ok maybe it was intended) toward really listening to and loving the musical style took place in the heart of New Orleans. A few years ago, I spent some time in the city assisting with cleanup after hurricane Katrina. It was an emotionally challenging time and before leaving I found myself sitting with friends at a cafe in the french quarter. The sun was shining down, I was eating something delicious and there was a man playing the saxophone. I could hear other music coming from the surrounding streets, but I was mesmerized by the sound coming from this one instrument. In the midst of so much pain and desruction that had fallen upon that place, that moment made everything seem just fine and I wanted it to last forever.
Since that glorious morning, I have entertained my jazzy groove. I love that the music lacks a defined structure, yet has so much heart. Beats are backwards, diverse sounds are aplenty and you never know what is coming next, yet somehow, it all comes together. It's simply fantastic.

I was fortunate enough to attend some jazzy shows while living in Chicago last year and I remember walking back to my apartment one night in the cold air singing. Tonight, I just wanted to dance. And it hit me as I drove down the valley that jazz (as much music does) lures me to respond. I allow myself to jump in to the unknown only knowing that if I don't want to miss a beat, I have to do something.
There's just no way I could conclude this post without of my favorite quotes by Donald Miller, from his book Blue Like Jazz...

"I never liked jazz music because jazz music doesn't resolve. But I was outside the Bagdad Theater in Portland one night when I saw a man playing the saxophone. I stood there for fifteen minutes, and he never opened his eyes.
After that I liked jazz music."

Are you feeling jazzy today?

listening to the day

my eyes open
my heart alive
the sun rises as warmth grabs
an echo of love I still cannot fully grasp
footsteps
a worn path
green grass
glistening water draws me
innocence.....patience
melody fills my ears, my mind
inspiration floods
tears are choked inside a calm and restless heart
wind swirls as dark clouds roll
raindrop
looking up the storm will pass
drowning in conviction
and hope
raindrops
remembering
the Sun returns
alone
surrounded
the road is noisy and carries on
but I am never the same

when moving becomes mundane

If I am not forgetting anything (which is possible considering the amount of memory moves are using), this is the 17th time in the last 11 years that I have packed up my "stuff" and moved it somewhere else. And to me, the crazy part is not that I have moved that many times, but rather that it has become a normal part of my life. I can tell you the best stores to dumpster dive for boxes and which days to go. I can teach you which types of clothes to roll and which to fold. I can even price quote ups shipping rates by sight. What I can't seem to do is stop moving! It's not that I don't enjoy the places I have lived. The dorm, the fun college houses, the mountains, the big city...I loved it all. Not only have I loved the places, I have loved the people. I have lived with 28 different people (you know who you are) in the last ten years and that experience has been wonderful and is irreplaceable.
Still, this has to stop sometime, doesn't it? I don't know.
I am starting to feel the desire to ground myself a little more, but I think the problem is that my heart will always be restless. I am constantly overwhelmed by the distant voices of new adventures, new causes and of the people I know and love and those I don't yet know calling me to be a part of something. Unfortunately, I didn't read the fine print....

Side effects of a restless heart may include:

packing tape growing out of your ears, dizziness, second guessing, disappearing money, the accumulation of more pieces of luggage than needed, a broken heart over and over, a worn-down vehicle, amazing memories, ticket-stub papercuts, tears, spontaneous laughter, 37 gazillion photographs, love, a "more ideas than the mind can hold" headache and passion.

The good news is that I think I am discovering a new way to direct my heart. I can't cure the restlessness. I just have to treat it. However, as I start medicating myself, I am moving three more times in the next year. Miraculously, in a few weeks, I will have all of my belongings in one place for the first time since high school at which point I will work a drastic reorganization of my life's belongings. Then, after my third move, I will stay in one place for at least a year. Maybe I will stay there for three years. Maybe five (gulp). Maybe ten. (is that even possible?)
Regardless of the years, mundane is getting kicked out.
I am going to take my medicine and move in new ways.